Ever feel like your just paddling around in circles, not progressing at all and ending up right where you started?
I'm feeling that more than ever right now.
I need another oar to get me propelled forward.
Friday, July 11, 2014
Thursday, February 27, 2014
Suddenly, everything changes...
It's amazing how quickly your life can change.
Three weeks ago, I was just heading to Cardiff to visit, intent on returning to Calgary for at least, the rest of the year.
Now, I'm finishing up my second week of my two-week notice and organising my life to move... back to Cardiff.
It's amazing how just little can shake up your life so incredibly.
I'm scared, but it's and excited scared.
It's going to be a great year.
Three weeks ago, I was just heading to Cardiff to visit, intent on returning to Calgary for at least, the rest of the year.
Now, I'm finishing up my second week of my two-week notice and organising my life to move... back to Cardiff.
It's amazing how just little can shake up your life so incredibly.
I'm scared, but it's and excited scared.
It's going to be a great year.
Monday, January 6, 2014
It was a rough year for me. Please deal with it, or keep your thoughts to yourself, so I can.
It has been a really rough year for me.
2013, that is. The first 6 days of the new one have been pretty good.
2013 was a bit of a crap year for me and here's why, and please stay with me until the end, it does end on a good note:
-I made the heartbreaking decision to leave my beloved Wales on Jan. 2, or there abouts. So I started it off with a real cracker of good feelings.
-Following that decision, things began coming smoothly in place, confirming for me that I'd made the right decision.
-The end of February, I left Wales. And moved back to Canada. And spent the next several months in a whirlwind of travelling.
- In those months, I found myself more lost than ever. Unsure of where I was supposed to be, and unable to start taking the steps to find that place because of continuing plans for more travel. I have never felt so out of place and completely at a loss as to what to do with my future as I did then.
-After 20 flights and six airports, I found my self back in the only place I'd felt completely at home since high school. Cardiff.
-I again had to leave my home and return to Canada. This time was worse, because I don't know when I will be back.
- I moved to a new city I'd barely been to before, where the closest family I had around was 40 minutes away and very busy.
I arrived with no friends and no connection to the area.
- I moved in to a dark basement suite, with horrendously loud and horrible upstairs neighbours and realized I'm not cut out for retail long term.
- I became border-lined depressed due to my unpleasant work and living situation. I'd never experienced that before and it terrified me.
-I continue to struggle to find the purpose of my move to Calgary.
- I had confirmed to me that the man I thought was my perfect match, indeed, was not, due to his complete lack of interest in me in any romantic sense.
So yeah. Last year was rough. Really rough. And it doesn't do any good for people to try to downplay the crap of it all.
It was a rough year. And I will not rescind that it was. It was a crap year and I will label it so.
But... 2013 is over.
All the garbage and unpleasantness from that year can stay in it.
2014 is a new fresh start.
I've moved in to a new home with a lovely flatmate. I'm in process of finding new employment.
And I have very real plans to return to Cardiff.
So, what if last year sucked? It's last year.
There are so many potentially good things for me this year. Some I'm aware of and some I have no idea are on the horizon.
I have a beautiful future ahead of me and, although I have no idea what it is, I have my faith, family and friends to help me get there.
It's a bit scary and daunting, but I'm up for it.
2014 is going to be good. Because I'm going to make it that way.
2013, that is. The first 6 days of the new one have been pretty good.
2013 was a bit of a crap year for me and here's why, and please stay with me until the end, it does end on a good note:
-I made the heartbreaking decision to leave my beloved Wales on Jan. 2, or there abouts. So I started it off with a real cracker of good feelings.
-Following that decision, things began coming smoothly in place, confirming for me that I'd made the right decision.
-The end of February, I left Wales. And moved back to Canada. And spent the next several months in a whirlwind of travelling.
- In those months, I found myself more lost than ever. Unsure of where I was supposed to be, and unable to start taking the steps to find that place because of continuing plans for more travel. I have never felt so out of place and completely at a loss as to what to do with my future as I did then.
-After 20 flights and six airports, I found my self back in the only place I'd felt completely at home since high school. Cardiff.
-I again had to leave my home and return to Canada. This time was worse, because I don't know when I will be back.
- I moved to a new city I'd barely been to before, where the closest family I had around was 40 minutes away and very busy.
I arrived with no friends and no connection to the area.
- I moved in to a dark basement suite, with horrendously loud and horrible upstairs neighbours and realized I'm not cut out for retail long term.
- I became border-lined depressed due to my unpleasant work and living situation. I'd never experienced that before and it terrified me.
-I continue to struggle to find the purpose of my move to Calgary.
So yeah. Last year was rough. Really rough. And it doesn't do any good for people to try to downplay the crap of it all.
It was a rough year. And I will not rescind that it was. It was a crap year and I will label it so.
But... 2013 is over.
All the garbage and unpleasantness from that year can stay in it.
2014 is a new fresh start.
I've moved in to a new home with a lovely flatmate. I'm in process of finding new employment.
And I have very real plans to return to Cardiff.
So, what if last year sucked? It's last year.
There are so many potentially good things for me this year. Some I'm aware of and some I have no idea are on the horizon.
I have a beautiful future ahead of me and, although I have no idea what it is, I have my faith, family and friends to help me get there.
It's a bit scary and daunting, but I'm up for it.
2014 is going to be good. Because I'm going to make it that way.
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Not always knowing where I'm going, but never, ever lost.